Increased material losses in disputes between partners, usually children. As a convincing goal, they are unconsciously or not treated as a playable or punching game to satisfy parents' frustration, anxiety, and insecurity.
With financial problems there is no opposite. Whether extraordinary chase, debt accumulation, bad shopping habits or divorce - children usually bear the biggest burden of a bad financial situation. Brad Klontz, a well-known financial planner and psychologist, comes as an adult with a tenure because of the noise of income among people today: "financial incest" or "engagement."
What is incest or financial commitment?
When adults overburden or overburden their financial problems to deal with their stress, they enjoy "attachment." This cushioning pain can be frightening for a child, usually causing it to inhibit or even hurt his financial strength. This can cause money, trends and bad financial habits to be at the forefront.
In a study published in the Journal of Financial Therapy, in 2012, Klontz described "an inappropriate impasse by teenagers who were in financial trouble with their parents, including talking to them about financial pressure and arranging children as ambassadors to deliver messages between adults "
How can financial incest be financed?
Here are some ways we can put income pressure on your child:
-They blame the partners for the need for money, either because of poor spending habits or because of nonpayment after divorce.
-You owe a child an offer we enter to accommodate the requirements, be it preparation or entertainment.
-You are very unhappy to alert you to the loss of the persecution or loss and to feel better after the child's breathing.
-You have set it up as your Disaster Manager to meet financial obligations such as bill payments, loans, EMI or rent.
-You're losing revenue from slot or board costs because you're disappointed with your partner.
What is the effect and long lasting improvement?
"Having a child with information about a condition that it can not control or fix will result in revenge or guilt," said Priya Sunder, director of PeakAlpha Investment Service.
If he can not find a solution to the problem or change the situation, he will feel frustrated and lead to fiery financial habits. For shopping or stinginess. He can turn into workaholism, or exclude fixed work grounds, or even have a bad financial harmony with his partner afterwards. "The effects must not be too long, unless a child is postulated by rest or a constant loss of money," added Sunder.
How can someone talk to children about income but not detest them?
It is always a good idea to have income talks with children, but to introduce negative games, fees or criticism.
"Children are very smart and when we lie down and explain a situation, they will understand immediately," said Sunder. As long as we plead for him, but accuse a child, and inspire him to solve the problem, to solve it, this will be a condition for both, "
Parental trap: correct mistakes
Poor financial conditions, which are described by wrong behavior, can satisfy children. Knowing how to debate the right thing at the right time.
Refusal to buy items due to single income or missing account
The wrong way:
"Do we know how difficult it is for us to manage the place of residence and support you? We can not always do all your finals!"
The right way
"I get the amount tied up, so we first had to pick up important items like groceries, clothes, bills, and loan payments, and only the income left after that loss can be spent on luxury and entertainment."
Dealing with creditors
The wrong way:
"Please tell your uncle that the father is not compensating for his not being in town and usually overdue after one month."
The right way
Do not force children to distort on your behalf. Make a plan to pay off your debts. Then lie down and explain to a child, because we can not earn immediately and how we plan to do it in the future.
Bad financial habits of the partner
The wrong way
"Your mother spends all her income on clothes and jewelery, how can we save on her unfamiliar training?"
The right way to juga family too
sit and calculate the compulsory scope for education. "We have to take all the shortcuts and reduce the loss of choice if we want to investigate abroad, and we can even take credit for it."
Subdivision or divorce of financial problems
The wrong way:
"You can not vote for a propaganda visit because your dad does not often provide alimony and we do not have enough money!"
The right way
"I have a single income and I have to take care of important things first, so if we both try to save more, we can take a walk next year."
Loss of a job
The wrong way
"We can't go on vacation if I'm alert! Just accept it!" To hide facts from a child, chastity is fine, and reasons are made to interfere with or eat a holiday.
The right way
"I hope for a very profitable pursuit and have looked for it, we must be a means to find it immediately and until that happens, we need to reduce the loss of choices such as food or pleasant trips."
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